Not Like Him
Grace
I don't say anything, just turn my back to him and start brewing tea again.
I should only feel some sympathy for him, and his family...
But I keep doing more than that.
My heart clenches every time that I realize what Tristin must be feeling right now. It hurts more when I think about Alma and Ania. It's sick to feel anything for Alma...but I can't help myself. Tristin stays behind me for a few moments. Then, leaves and sits on the couch.
I shoot him a side glance, watching his lowered head and his fingers brushing his wet hair.
"The...worst fact in life is that... " Tristin murmurs in a low voice. " you can not choose your family."
My parents' faces flash before my eyes. He is indeed right. If I could choose, I would have chosen to be born to anyone but them. I would have chosen anyone as my sibling but Lily.
"If that's not enough...you can't even change their past or go back to make them choose something else. " Tristin whispers.
I blink and pour the tea into cups before walking to the lounge. Tristin doesn't pick his head, just stares at the floor and takes deep breaths.
I take my spot on the other side of the couch, looking at the side of his face, unable to look anywhere else.
"You know... "Tristin pauses to swallow. " when I first got to know the truth about my mother, I left home...but not before yelling at her and calling her names. I... insulted my mother, shouted at her, and didn't stop even when she cried or pleaded with me to listen to her. " Knowing about their interaction now, it's hard for me to imagine Tristin doing that. He is always...so soft towards his mother that I could have never guessed that he was ever like that to her.
"My father was on his deathbed and he heard every word I told my mother. And...so he died hating my mother. He forbade her and Ania from attending his funeral. He would have disowned them if he had more time to live or maybe, he would have had them killed like he... "Tristin places his hands over his nape and lowers his face some more." It was...all because of my anger that I couldn't suppress."
A lump lodges in my throat. I look away and fist my hands in my lap.
"What's stupid is that...my father was the bigger cheater. Throughout his marriage to Mom, he would get drunk, bring women home and fuck them in the room next to my mother's room. When he was done, he would beat up my mother and us for the smallest of
was his way of...estakes. This
his
power, of telling us that we must obey him like slaves and just a mere rebellion could land us in hell." He continues.
Shock ripples through my body. My gaze lands on the side of his face again but I can no longer see it. It's hidden behind his wrist now, and I can't tell the look in his eyes.
me.
"She tried to get a divorce, but...my Mom's parents didn't let her. Powerful people like my father and my Mom's parents wouldn't leave her alone and let her live in peace if she even tried to escape. "Tristin drops his hands in his lap, lifts his head, and directs his gaze at Our gazes lock. His eyes are filled with vulnerability. My shoulders stiffen and instinctively, my hand reaches for his hand.
She was like you." He murmurs. "I think that's why...I always felt drawn to you. Your situation was similar to my Mom's but...you, Grace, you didn't do what Mom did. You would never cheat on your husband, no matter what, right? You wouldn't..."
Tristin looks away and pauses. My fingers brush against the back of his hand gently.
"I want to think that Mom destroyed our family but thinking back to how she was treated at her home, by everyone around her, by my father, can't bring myself to hate her again. After growing up, I find myself
accepting her just like she gai
I will
never shout at her or insult her because she might have done what she did...but she has always been a good mother to Sebastian, me, and Ania. She gave us her best. She
protected us as much as she could.Text content © NôvelDrama.Org.
She..."
His breath hitches and he lowers his face again. I can sense his struggle. It's eating away at him.
"I know, Tristin. Alma is a good mother. I understand why you can never hate her. " I whisper, instinctively, gripping his fingers.
"Sebastian protected our family as long as he was alive. He was raised to be this perfect Heir to the business empire, to be the man for our family... " Tristin's voice lowers again. " while he was here...alive...with us...I was free. I could feel bitter about my life all I wanted. I could roam around, and do whatever I needed with my life and no one cared to notice me."
He talks about his brother as if he has always seen him as his savior.
After he died, he left me with this responsibility was supposed to protect our family. " Tristin murmurs softly. "But I have failed, right? Just like I failed to stop him that day, He preferred death over letting the world know that his sister was the result of an affair and look at me... am still alive, and sitting here like I am totally fine. Like...I am not
ashamed that I failed-"
"Tristin. "I don't know what pushes me to close the distance between and sling my arm around his neck to pull him towards me. "It's not your fault."
His shoulders go taut under my grip. He stays rigid for a few seconds, then turns to me and rests his forehead in the crook of my shoulder.
"It is. It is my fault. That's why I ran away again and came here. I can not... face my sister. I know she wants me there. She must be waiting for me. But I can't... bring myself to go to her. I am not Sebastian, Grace. I wish I was...but I am not. I can try to be like him, I can pretend to be like him but the truth is...that he is dead, and now everything has burned to ashes."
He doesn't continue, just tightens his arms around me and goes silent.